Last week I counted down the top 10 most ridiculous covers from the classic children horror novel series, Goosebumps. The thing about Goosebumps is that, for every dumb cover they had, they also had an awesome one that made you want to read the story inside. So for this entry, I've picked my 10 favorite covers. So let's get started...
10. Monster Blood II
I never really cared much for the Monster Blood series of stories, but they must have made R.L. Stine a good amount of money, because he made 4 of them. I can't speak to the quality of the tales, because it's been almost 20 years since I last read a Goosebumps book, but just going by the covers, this has to be the best Monster Blood of them all. Look at it, it's a giant hampster, and he just looks so happy. Monster blood makes dreams come true.
9. Egg Monsters From Mars
That deformed chicken placenta looks mighty angry, with angry egg-brows and everything. This gets bonus points for the fact that R.L. Stine managed to write a horror story about freaking eggs!
8. A Night in Terror Tower
This cover is great because of the simplicity. Looking at it now reminds me of games like Resident Evil 3: Nemesis or Amnesia: The Dark Descent. I don't remember if this guy is the only villain in the story, but the idea of being pursued by someone is quite terrifying, especially if that dude looks like Quasimodo wearing an executioner's mask and wielding a giant axe.
7. Revenge of the Lawn Gnomes
I love that these lawn gnomes are drawn to look like a couple of toughs straight out of a 1960s musical. They look like they should be leaning on a hot rod and smoking Camels.
6. Night of the Living Dummy III
The Night of the Living Dummy stories were my absolute favorite Goosebumps stories. I don't know why, I just loved them, the idea of a living ventriloquist dummy was very intriguing to me as a child. And what's better than a living dummy (because I know you're asking)? Ten living dummies. That's ten times the HORROR!!! However, I remember in the TV series that the dummy actually looked more like Gabbo from The Simpsons than he did Slappy from these books.
5. The Scarecrow Walks at Midnight
When I was at the height of my Goosebumps fandom, I was also really big into the Scary Stories series, and this cover, along with the story "Harold" from Scary Stories taught me to be terrified of scarecrows. It also elicits memories of Children of the Corn, even though the two stories are completely different.
4. Attack of the Mutant
I've never been into reading comic books, but I love comic book characters. I remember reading this story and thinking that it reminded me of the Sega Genesis game, Comix Zone, even though this story is the opposite of the game, where the comic book character comes into the real world instead of the other way around. The character pictured here just looks awesome, that's why I included it. Shut up, I don't need another reason.
3. You Can't Scare Me
On the TV series, the mud monsters from this episode look completely ridiculous. Here, however, they look terrifying. They look like they want to eat your soul, they also look like Swamp Thing, which gives them an increase in awesomeness.
2. The Curse of Camp Cold Lake
This is probably the only Goosebumps cover that could actually scare a little child. It looks like it could be the poster of a legitimate horror film. This was one of the last Goosebumps books in the original series run, and even though the story was done to death in the series (this is the 4th one about a kid at camp), it's one of the more memorable covers there is. Also, this cover reminds me of Skeletor at the post-credits scene in the live-action Masters of the Universe film, and that's never a bad thing.
1. The Werewolf of Fever Swamp
This is the definitive Goosebumps cover. Whenever I think of the series, I immediately have this image pop into my head. It's so awesome, even today. You got the full moon, that B.A. wolf, the pale purple of the sky, the bubbling swamp, and some poor child's clothes...which somehow were untouched before the wolf decided to devour him. Now, let us remember how awesome this cover is while listening to "Bark at the Moon."